The winner of Kveller’s third ever Passover parody contest is here and well, what can we say? It goes oh so hard. When we sent Rabbi Jaclyn Cohen of Temple Isaiah in Los Angeles, the performer of this year’s parody, the winning lyrics from our contest — Gordon Lustig’s parody of Miley Cyrus’ “Wrecking Ball” titled, of course, “Matzah Balls” — we had high expectations. Cohen’s Purim parodies, like this “Wicked-ly” brilliant one and this great rendition of Lizzo’s “Juice,” turned into, of course, “Jews,” are some of our favorites.
But what we got… well, it came in like a wrecking ball, and blew every other Passover and Jewish holiday parody we’ve seen before out of the water (or out of the chicken soup?).
While unlike last years’ parody, there are no shirtless Jonah Platts in this video directed by David Fickas, it is just as dramatic and impossible to look away from. It features matzah ball making (no, it’s not sponsored by Manischewitz, but hey, hit us up next year!!), and award-worthy acting from Cohen who perfectly channels the energy of the songstress from Tennessee but also the rage and disappointment we all feel when our Passover dishes just don’t turn out quite right.
The video starts with Cohen on that traditional white background the original 2013 video was shot on, as she sings about toiling on those matzah balls. We also see her cooking one of the genuinely least appetizing soups we’ve ever seen (those chopped baby carrots are terrifying, though to be fair, the matzah balls don’t look half bad). Guest actor and Jaclyn’s real-life husband Joshua Cohen plays the disappointed taster of the matzah balls, and Jaclyn’s face when she sees he’s not a fan? Someone give her an Emmy right now! (No relationships were harmed in the making of this video, we hope!)
For those of you whose matzah balls didn’t quite pass muster at this year’s seder, you can channel your rage through Cohen as she hits matzahs, gigantic blow-up matzah balls and even Magna-Tiles (so satisfying) with her soup ladle in this wonderfully chaotic video.
And yes, of course, the video ends with Cohen literally swinging on a matzah ball, an homage to the original Miley Cyrus video. I truly didn’t know what my life was missing was a video with a rabbi swinging from a giant matzah ball in a playground. Unlike the song’s titular soup dumplings, this entire video is truly chef’s kiss perfection.
The winning lyrics of our parody were written by 65-year-old Lustig, who like Cohen, is a Jewish professional from the west coast. He lives with his wife in Napa, CA, where he is the music director at Congregation Beth Shalom and the dad to two adult children. Lustig actually heard about our contest from CBS congregant Sheri Kohos (thanks Sheri!) who rightfully surmised it had his name written all over it (well, now it literally does!). Lustig decided he wanted to write a song about matzah balls, and googled songs with the word balls in it. He was immediately drawn to the “intensity and the power” of Cyrus’ hit, he told Kveller over e-mail. Lustig has been writing parodies for over 50 years (!). When he was a teen, two of his parodies even played on Dr. Demento’s radio show, including a parody of Simon & Garfunkel’s “The Boxer” — truly an omen of things to come. If you love this song, you must check out his rich repertoire of past parodies (he even dueted with Randy Rainbow!).
For those of you not familiar with Rabbi Jaclyn Cohen (we’re so happy to remedy that), she’s a rabbi of West LA’s Temple Isaiah, “a remarkable intergenerational synagogue,” as she calls it. Her days at the synagogue are full and long, coming up with creative programs like the Beyonceder, grabbing coffee with religious school parents, writing her dvar torahs for Shabbat.
Cohen has a lot of parodies still up her sleeve. Though her son is pushing for an “I Just Can’t Wait to Be Queen” Lion King parody for next Purim, her dream duet would be with Idina Menzel. The two even met when Menzel attended a bat mitzvah at Cohen’s synagogue; Cohen said that leading that service in front of the Jewish “Wicked,” “Rent” and “Frozen” star for 90 minutes was an “out of body experience.”
For Cohen, holiday parodies are more than mere silly distractions. “It probably won’t surprise anyone that there are elements to serving as clergy that are filled with so much sadness, so much solemnity. The last year and a half in particular has been incredibly difficult for nearly every Jewish professional I know; I feel like I’ve aged ten years in eighteen months,” she told Kveller over e-mail. “But I’ve learned that these parodies in many ways serve as a counterpoint to the heaviness of it all. The infusion of joy and silliness is quite healing for me, and I would argue for our congregation, too. I think that’s my rabbinic vision in a nutshell: try to infuse each day of your life with a dose of Jewish joy. We need it now more than ever.”
Without further ado, we give you the Jewish joy pill (ball?) that is “Matzah Balls.”
Lyrics of “Matzah Balls” by Gordon Lustig:
