Kvellers, we are about to announce the winner of our third annual Passover parody contest with a truly delightful new video, but in the meantime, we want to share an honorable mention that we just can’t stop kvelling about.
Among the dozens of lyrics submissions to our contest, one stood out as particularly incredible. It came to us via an e-mail from a Maryland 5th grader, Naomi Lanman. “Face the Plagues,” Lanman’s submission, is not only an amazing parody of the song “Don’t Lose Ur Head” from the British musical “SIX,” which has been on Broadway since 2020, but it’s also a really well-done retelling of the Passover story in its own right! Lanman also sent us a recording of her singing the song with such talent and emotion. We were honestly floored when we first listened! We’re convinced we’ll see Naomi on the Broadway stage sometime in the future.
While the song itself didn’t feel like a good contender to be one of our finalists — not enough people (unfortunately!) know the musical about the six wives of Henry VIII — we just had to find a way to share its brilliance. So we decided to create a lyric video for Lanman’s incredibly impressive recording, which you can listen to and watch below.
We’re so excited to share our Passover parody contest winner with you soon, but in the meantime, we just want to say mazel tov and kol hakavod to Naomi! And happy Passover to all!
Lyrics of “Face the Plagues” by Naomi Lanman
Parody of “Don’t Lose Ur Head” from “SIX: The Musical”
Grew up as slaves, worked hard every day
‘Til a baby boy came from the river Nile
He was named Moses by the Pharaoh’s daughter
He was drawn from the water
As a child
Jew-ews were doing labor
So Moses punched an enslaver
Ran away, saw a shrub on fire
And soon the burning bush got Moses inspired
G-d wanted him to go out on a limb
And tell Pharaoh, “Let my people go!”
Obviously, it was not easy
And sadly, Pharaoh said, “Oh, no!”
Ooooh so G-d created ten
Horrible plagues to see if then
The Jew-ews could be free
Pharoah said “Yes” and made the Jews flee
(Uh-oh here we go)
He changed his mind
But Moses made it so the Jews were hard to find
Put his staff in the water to block Pharaoh’s path
Then crossed to the promised land
“Sorry, not sorry” is what G-d said
“We stand up for what’s right
Like many times before
We will win the fight”
Day-ein-u we’ll push through
Like we always do
“Sorry not sorry” is what G-d said
“Now face the plagues!”
Frogs in his bed and frogs on his head
Pharaoh should have listened to us
Darkness everywhere, lice in his hair
Boils, hail, and locusts
Boo-ooh is what we said to Haman
Pharoah is just another one claimin’ Jew-ews are not strong
And just like everybody else He was wrong
“Sorry, not sorry” is what G-d said
“We stand up for what’s right
Like many times before
We’ll win the fight”
Day-ein-u we’ll push through ’cause we are Jews
“Sorry, not sorry” is what G-d said
Now face the plagues
