Can You Tell These Real Breastfeeding Products from the Fake Ones?

Our society is pretty weird about breastfeeding, big on shaming moms who don’t do it while also shaming moms who do breastfeed in public. Add to this double-bind the whole pumping phenomenon, and you’ve got a lot of stressed out, under-pressure moms.

So capitalism has caught on by trying to sell all kinds of accessories for nursing and pumping moms (some of those are amazing, don’t get me wrong)—and presto! You’ve got a treasure trove of product-name puns about the words “boob” and “milk” that are funny, infantilizing, strange, clever and honestly, just plain weird.

To celebrate this abundance of tata-themed trademarks, we present you with a quiz.

Can you tell which of these product names are real and which we made up? Answers at bottom.

Can we ask?

It's important to us to keep the warm, joyfully Jewish community on Kveller accessible for all. Reader donations help us do just that. Can you spare a few to keep Kveller free? (We'll love you forever.)

Support Us

1-Booby Trap

2-HotMilk

3-The Udder Woman

4-Moo Moo Mama

5-Boobie Bars

6-Milkmakers

7-Yummy Mummy

8-Hooter Hiders

9-My Breast Friend

10-Bamboobies

11-Latch ‘n’ Catch

12-Milkies

13-Freemies

14-Silky Milkers

15- Bébé Au Lait

Answers:

1 fake 2 real 3 fake 4 fake 5 real 6 real 7 real 8 real 9 real 10 real 11 fake 12 real 13- real 14 fake 15 real

If you got them all right, you’ve probably breastfed in the last few years. Congratulations to you and your sore boobs.

Sarah M. Seltzer

Sarah Seltzer, former editor for Kveller, is a writer and editor in New York City. She is a journalist covering culture, activism and gender, most recently as Deputy Editor at culture website Flavorwire.com. Her print and online work has appeared in publications including Poets & Writers, The Forward, Lilith, The Washington Post, Ms. Magazine, The New York Times, Salon, The Nation, The Wall Street Journal, Jezebel, The Hairpin, Refinery29, The Toast, Rolling Stone, and many more. She is a graduate of Harvard University, where she edited The Crimson’s weekend magazine, as well as the MFA in writing program at Vermont College of Fine Arts. Her first baby, Mikey, is growing up way too fast and she can objectively report that he is very cute. You can follow her at @sarahmseltzer and reach her at sarah@kveller.com.